On the outside looking in

An odd girl; she embraces it.

I am definitely unusual in this part of the world. I was born in a foreign country and have an unusual name. I never wore the right clothes nor acted the right way. In this Texas suburb I stick out like a like a hang nail: snagging, snarling, and tearing deeper into the flesh. After living here nineteen years, I’ve discovered that Southern hospitality, at least in Kingwood, is a myth. Call me a cynic, but after enduring so much pain any other person might feel the same way. Thankfully, with time, books and one wonderful friend named Sharon, the pain has slowly given way to understanding. I know that I will never fit in here, but I’ve finally found a deep sense of comfort in that. I’ve realized that everyone who tortured me was really looking for a way to hide their own strangeness. If I really wanted to fit in with them, I’d have to turn around and do the same thing they did to others. No, I’ve chosen to turn my back on fitting in. Now, I’ve learned the wisdom in seeking out the unusual. Sure, I am atypical in this part of the world. I am proud to be born in a foreign country. I am slowly coming to terms with my unusual name. I don’t care about wearing the right clothes, and I know to act the right way is to be intolerant. I am an agnostic atheist. I am a humanist and a liberal anarchist. These traits certainly set me apart. However, since I’ve chosen not to fit in, I’ve learned that we all have the capacity to become more tolerant, caring, and ethical. We can transcend the pain that we inflict on each other for being different. We can embrace that we are all a little odd.

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