“I hate how much I love.”
My sister and I are not close, we never really were. We have been so incredibly different for as far back as I can remember. My personality depends on how she has treated me my whole life. I blame her for my lack of self-confidence as well as my intense social anxiety. I believe I have bad posture because of the way she has beat me down. She is the reason I am the way I am. Every day, I try so hard to work on bits and pieces of myself. I cannot go sixty seconds without thinking about her. Her addiction worries me, always. Her lack of self-worth scares me more than anything. She is the reason I am saving myself for marriage, I never want to go through what she’s been through.