Life is a journey not meant for the faint hearted. I used to live my life on the edge, some might even say i was out of control. From a young age i have been told by many people that i posses a gift, a very special gift but because i was told this and chose not to accept it, i rebelled. I went by the motto “life is a journey in which you should not get to the final destination in an orderly manner with your body intact but instead enter sideways with your body in a million and one pieces and you saying “wow what a wicked, wild ride” and it got me alot of “friends” or so i thought but it also took me further and further away from God. My parents tried to talk to me but i never listened and although they did not give up trying they just did not know what to do anymore. Then i began to lose control of the ride called life and it skidded and it swayed, i was going down an a one way road and the destination was rock bottom. It’s funny how the closer you get to the bottom the less “friends” you have but the higher you go the more you gain and that is exactly what happened to me. The closer i got to the bottom the fewer the friends i had until i was left with a handful who from the begining had told me that i was going to lose control. The few true friends who i had left and who i still today proudly call my friends and my family gave me tough love,i became my own worst enemy, i felt rejected and all alone and it is in that time that i discovered my faith. The closer i got to the bottom the more i prayed, the more i prayed the more i learned to trust in God, the more i learnt to trust in God the more i came to hear my conscience speak, the more i heard my conscience speak the more i evaluated my life’s decisions and the more i evaluated my life’s decisions the more i came to realize that the life i had lived although it seemed that it had drowned my conscience and through everything i felt that i was alone, i never was. It took me almost losing everything that i hold dear to me to realize that i was never alone, God was there the whole time, watching and waiting for me to realize his presence and give my life to him. I am not one to break down, infact i am the kind of person who finds people who do weak but that day i broke down as i read Joshua 1:9 which reads: “be strong, be brave, fear not for I the Lord your God will always be with you wherever you go”. It is that passage that led me to make a decision that the gift i have that i would grow and nurture it until it reached it’s full potential and when that happens i will keep my promise to devote that gift to bringing people back into his fold for he has been with me through thick and thin, good times and bad times, when i sinned against him and when i glorified him, and although i feel unworthy i realize that he gave his only son for me(John 3:16) and i will let the crucifixion of Christ be in vain. I am Dolan Haniso Lebatilwe Malepa, some people call me Shawn and im am AWESOME because i walk with God daily and he is there for me at all times.
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